Mish Mosh is my place for lists. Unlike David Letterman, who saves his best for last, I meander around.
How to Tell if You’ve Had a Great Vacation
1. On your first day back to work you can’t help but notice that your office building looks like a prison (all that cement, windows that don’t open, guards at doors)
2. When you put your lanyard around your neck, you get a flash of a noose hanging at a gallows.
3. You sit in your car for a long time. You only get out because you know a security camera is focused on your car.
4. You walk the halls telling your vacation stories to co-workers (even to ones you don’t like).
5. When they get sick of you, you start making lunch plans with vendors.
6. You download all your vacation photos into a slide show on your computer (and get startled again and again when your reverie is interrupted).
7. Your tour books are still in your purse.
8. You keep listening to the bagpipe CD in your car (no one will drive with you anymore).
9. You start planning your next vacation, even though you used up two year’s worth of vacation on your last trip.
10. You dream that Elizabeth Gilbert’s publisher will call you to fund a year of travel so you can write your own version of EAT, PRAY, LOVE.
